No, I am not kidding

Often, our kids play with the neighborhood boy--Ben--who lives across the street. He is an only child so it is like an instant party for him when our kids come out and play.

Ben is quite the creative fellow. So, I wasn't surprised when he brought out his magnifying glass on Friday afternoon and was trying to 'burn' things. Sophie ran inside to get an Oreo, saying they were going to try to 'burn' it. They were magnifying the rays of sunlight upon the object and basically trying to start a fire. I wasn't the least bit concerned--whoever heard of such a thing actually producing flames? I even thought to myself, "Hey, this can be my kid's science experiment for the week. Thanks, Ben!" (Sidenote: by the way, don't think for a minute I wasn't on to Sophie when she came in for the Oreo. If you know Sophie, you know her love for food and you know she had an ulterior motive. She had plans to eat that experiment when it was all said and done.)

Anyway, they spent their time Friday afternoon experimenting. So, Saturday rolls around. Wes and Jeremiah played outside with all the neighborhood kids for a little awhile before lunch. While they were having lunch I asked them: 'so what do you guys plan to do after lunch?'

Wes' response: 'Oh, we'll probably walk around with Ben and burn things.'

Nice.

I chuckle inwardly. I suppress a smile. Ha, Ha. Walk around and 'burn' things. Good thing it's all just innocent fun....

Ten minutes later I look out the front door to check on them and about pee in my pants. THERE IS A FIRE SHOOTING UP OFF MY NEIGHBOR'S DRIVEWAY WITH FLAMES ONE FOOT HIGH. The pyromaniacs are next to it, looking on. All three of them.

I throw open the door. 'THAT IS NOT FUNNY--PUT THAT OUT! THIS INSTANT!'

I dialed Ben's mom, whom I have on speed dial for reasons such as these. 'Excuse me, but there is a fire with one foot high flames in your driveway...'

Moral to the story? Do not let your child play with magnifying glasses and paper. Seriously.

DADDY, PLEASE GET HOME!

Dear Daddy,

I think Mommy needs you to get home. She has been in the bathtub for over an hour, she has had two starbucks today, her hair is looking even crazier than usual and she is letting us watch lots of movies. Actually, we kind of like the movie watching. Oh, and little 'O' threw up all over his bed. You might need to bring her something extra special from your trip.

Love, Soph

Another 'Wes-ism'

Our six year old, Wes (who is our #3 child, so he is right smack dab in the middle!), is our most observant child and is what we like to call 'our thinker'. His wheels are always turning as he watches the things around him. He is also very 'out of the box'. Couple this with a dry sense of humor and you get some of the funniest off the cuff comments and discussions out of him. The other day he was helping me fold clothes. As he was folding underwear he said:

"You know, when I was little, you know like three or four, when we were coming out of church I would look at everybody walking out and I would think that they had the same kind of underwear on as me. And then I would think that would be really wierd if everybody was walking out of church with just their underwear on...But now that I'm older I know that there are lots of different kinds of underwear...and daddys underwear looks a lot different than my underwear..."

So there you have it. Another 'Wes-ism'.

The next time you are walking by a child at church--BEWARE--they just might be thinking about your underwear! :)