When all is said and done, I want desperately for my children to speak of me as one who spent time with the Lord and in so doing that it flowed into every part of my life. One day when they look back upon their childhood, I want them to see a mother who prayed with them, taught them the holy scriptures and most importantly--LIVED IT OUT. Because if they remember me as one who led bible studies and prayer groups, who wrote and talked about the Christian life--but didn't see me live it out in the ordinary, mundane moments in life--then all the 'outer work' was in vain. You see, all the 'outer work' is really the easy part. The harder part is working it out moment by moment. The harder part is being Christ to your husband when he is doing the very thing that drives you nuts. The harder part is being Christ to your children when they are giving you a sour or defiant attitude. The harder part is daily dying to my own selfish desires in order to be the wife and mother that God has called me to be. It is sooooooooo hard. But it can be done if I rely on God's strength in all of my weaknesses.
Below, I am sharing with you a quote from a son about his mother. I read this in my devotional the other day--it was inspiring to me. It reminds me of what my purpose is. It reminds me that the season--right now--is to disciple these children with whom God has entrusted me. It reminds me to not get sidetracked with other things right now. My earnest prayer is that one day my children--too--would speak of me this way. Yes, I have a long way to go. I mess up a lot. One thing is for sure, though--His mercies are new every morning.
My mother made it a habit every day, immediately after breakfast, to spend an hour in her room, reading the Bible, meditating over it, and praying to the Lord. That hour was like a blessed fountain from which she drew the strength and sweetness that perpared her to complete all her tasks. It also enabled her to maintain a genuine peacefulness in spite of the normal trying worries and pettiness that so often accompany life in a crowded neighborhood. As I think of her life and all that she had to endure, I see the absolute triumph of the grace of God in the ideal Christian lady. She was susch a lovely person that I never saw her lose her temper or speak even one word in anger. I never heard her participate in idle gossip or make a disparaging remark about another person. In fact, I never saw in her even the hint of an emotion unbecoming to someone who had drunk from the 'the river of the water of life' (Rev. 22:1) and who had eaten of 'the living bread that came down from heaven' (John 6:51) ~Frederick William Farrar
Okay, I do have to make one last comment. I have to admit that it does sound a bit idealistic. Maybe, like me, you read this and immediately think--Yeah right. She never lost her temper? She never had an unbecoming emotion--NEVER? Yes, I had those same thoughts too. I think we can read that and immediately feel guilty, knowing that in our own lives this is not the case. And, truly, in this woman's life I am sure it wasn't the case either. Nobody is perfect. This mother wasn't perfect. The point is--this is what she was characterized by. And what we are characterized by is what we will be remembered by. I am sure she had some bad days, but the beauty of her meek and quiet spirit--enabled only through Christ--outshone every bit of it. The time she spent with the Lord enabled her to be what she could not be on her own.
Yes, I am an absolute mess. I am a sinner in need of a Savior. We all are. This mother must have understood that too. She allowed Him to be her Savior and be what she could not be. She
immersed herself in scripture and believed by faith that He could be all things that she could not. We too, can do that.