Perseverance

Perseverance--this is the word I feel that the Lord has given me this year as He has whispered to me over and over:

'Persevere, precious child--you can, if you rely on me.'

This is what I felt He said to me when He led me to run a marathon. This is what I heard whispered to me as I pounded the pavement through my training. This is what I heard Him say to me on that scorching hot, excruciating day in Chicago.

As I ran the last six miles of the marathon, I was not prepared for the agony that my body would experience. I was not prepared for the pain that I could not get away from, no matter if I was running, walking or stopping and stretching. It was 100% torture. The pain was in full force and there was no getting around it--I had to move through it. I had to keep going.

Post marathon, I realize the mistake I made through that last painful hour. I took my eyes off of Jesus and focused completely on the pain. And as I focused more and more on how awful it was it became worse and worse and bigger and bigger. Remember the scripture cards I was determinedly going to carry and pray through as I ran? Did I pray through them once during those last six miles? Nope! In fact, they felt so heavy in my hands I almost through them down.

'Persevere, precious child--you can, if you rely on me.'

He whispered it to me--but I chose to focus instead on the circumstances of the moment.

Perseverance. The Lord has opened my eyes to a deeper appreciation and meaning of this word and what it looks like to actually do it. Running a marathon gave me a real, tangible definition to associate with this word. It has given me a little glimpse of the agony and torture that Jesus endured for us on the cross. It has given me a backdrop against which to lay the difficulties and troubles that arise in everyday life:

I am going through my homeschooling day and coming up against all kinds of obstacles...I am about to throw my hands up in the air. Suddenly, I hear that gentle whisper: 'Persevere, precious child--you can, if you rely on me.' I am reminded of what it took to make it through those last six miles. I see Jesus up on the cross. My obstacles don't seem so difficult anymore.

Eric goes out of town for several days. On day four, loneliness starts to set in and one of the children get sick. I begin to let it defeat me and the whisper is so faint I almost miss it: 'Persevere, precious child--you can, if you rely on me.' I am reminded of the marathon. I see Jesus up on the cross. Once again, I get perspective on this momentary trouble and fight through it.

We came with Eric on a business trip and arrived last night. I geared up for staying in a hotel room with our five children. What I hadn't gearup up for was a stomach bug that hit me and one of our children, keeping us up most of the night. Today, I felt lousy. The last place I wanted to be was in a hotel. The last thing I felt like doing was all of the activities we had planned the night before. But I had no choice. I had five little ones counting on me. I felt the way I felt after the marathon--achey and flu like. It took me back to that day and again, I thought about that race. I heard the words of my Lord: 'Persevere, precious child--you can, if you rely on me.' As I forced myself through each step today I kept picturing those last miles. I kept picturing Jesus and the agony He endured. Everytime I pictured it, my current circumstance seemed a little bit smaller.

During my training, I heard so many people bewilderly say, 'that is so crazy--I just don't understand why you would want to put yourself through that.' They thought running a marathon was looney. But, I wouldn't trade anything for what I've learned through it. I have learned how to buck up and endure through chaotic days with my children. I have learned how to keep going when I am really tired in the middle of our school day. I have learned how to reach inside of me and pull more out when needed. I have learned more about relying on Jesus when there is nothing left in me to keep going. I have learned a little bit more about persevering.

We are told in God's Word that in this world we will have pain and suffering. Suffering is an invitation to know Jesus better. I am glad I took the challenge and ran the race. I am glad that I learned a little more about suffering. Today, I feel closer to Jesus. I leave you with the words of Paul:

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They doi it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize. 1 cor. 9:24-2

'Persevere, precious child--you can, if you rely on me.'

This Friend is MY Hero

So I see Eric and the kids at mile 10.5 and I run up to the curb to slap them high five and about fall out! My friend, Nicole is standing there with them cheering me on! WHAT IN THE WORLD????? I spent the whole rest of the race trying to figure out how in the world she got to Chicago and wondering what the story was.

I got the scoop after the race. She drove up the night before and spent the night with a friend and then met up that morning with Eric. WOW! What an AWESOME FUN surprise! My kids had a super fun time with her and having her there sure did make the weekend extra special for me. I had SO much fun hanging out with her afterwards!

My, oh my, I am once again speechless and beyond knowing what to say. ...except, girlfriend, you out did yourself! Thank you seems like such a small word....but thank you for making my day on Sunday! You are one in a million! Love you, sweet friend!!!

This is just so like God!

Oswald Chamber's 'My Utmost for His Highest' is my favorite devotional ever. It has a reading for every day of the year. This past Sunday, October 12 (the day of the marathon), the title of the reading was 'Getting Into God's Stride'. How cool is that?!! I love how God gives you just what you need when you need it! I am sharing the whole thing with you because it is just soooo good!

GETTING INTO GOD'S STRIDE

"Enoch walked with God..." (Genesis 5:24)

The true test of a person's spiritual life and character is not what he does in the extraordinary moments of life, but what he does during the ordinary times when there is nothing tremendous or exciting happening. a person's worth is revealed in his attitude toware the ordinary things of life when he is not under the spotlight (see John 1:35-37 and 3:30). It is painful work to get in step with God and to keep pace with Him--it means getting your second wind spiritually. In learning to walk with God, there is always the difficulty of getting into His stride, but once we have done so, the only characteristic that exhibits itself is the very life of God Himself. The individual person is merged into a personal oneness with God, and God's stride and His power alone are exhibited.

It is difficult to get into stride with God, because as soon as we start walking with Him we find that His pace has surpassed us before we have even taken three steps. He has different ways of doing things, and we have to be trained and disciplined in His ways. It was said of Jesus--"He will not fail nor be discouraged..." (Isaiah 42:4) because He never worked from His own individual standpoint, but always worked from the standpoint of His Father. And we must learn to do the same. Spiritual truth is learned through the atmosphere that surrounds us, not through intellectual reasoning. It is God's Spirit that changes the atmosphere of our way of looking at things, and then things begin to be possible which before were impossible. Getting into God''s stride means nothing less than oneness with Him. It takes a long time to get there, but keep at it. Don't give up because the pain is intense now--get on with it, and before long you will find that you have a new vision and a new purpose.

Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest

I love the beginning of this, where he talks about that what we do in the ordinary moments is what counts...not the extraordinary moments....I don't think it was a coincidence that I read this the day after the marathon--not the day of. It reminds me that every day I have to get into stride with God. All of those ordinary moments in life are what really matters. Life is a marathon...each little step counts...and I could go on and on but I have to go now and get into the 'ordinary' moments of my life with my five children! :)

Somehow--I finished!

I finished in 4:17:31....not exactly what I was aiming for....

I hoped to finish in 4:00. I was running my training runs right at 9:00 per mile, so I thought, 'sure, no problem'. I've put in the miles...I can do this thing....Right? WRONG!

HA! I have to laugh on this side of the race at my niavity.

I was so unprepared for what laid before me...I had absolutely no idea how difficult this race would be...how very hard those last six miles would be....

It was brutal. It was excruciating. All I can say is that God's grace pulled me through it.

I have friends who have ran this race and withstood those last six miles to finish strong and within their desired time. My admiration and amazement of them went up ten notches on Sunday. They are my heroes :)

This has been the biggest learning experience of my life. I hope to write about it over the next couple of days.... Whatever 'race' you are in this week, may you find strength through the Lord to endure and experience God's grace like never before!

"However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me--the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace"
Acts 20:24

Marathon Training Lesson #3

My training schedule called for one 'long run' a week. Long runs are so unpredictable. You can start out feeling great and just suddenly 'hit a wall'. The wall can be caused from lack of planning--not allowing time for adequate digesting of food, for example. It can also be caused by just pure physical problems such as cramps, shin splints, you name it. Other times, you just hit a wall for no apparent reason. I think these are just simply 'mental'. So much of running comes down to your 'mental game'. When I hit these walls, the only way I ever recovered was to refocus my thoughts. Halfway through my long runs, I began carrying scripture cards. When my mind would start to weaken, I would start praying scripture. Wow! This made a huge difference! I also began to shift my prayers to others rather than the 'me' prayers of 'give me strength, help me not be weary...' Refocusing worked; it worked every single time. It worked because I quit relying on myself and began relying on God. It worked because it quit being about me and started being about Him and others.

As I have been learning how to cope with 'the wall' in my training, I've thought about how much 'the wall' affects my daily life. I want so much to live my life focused on God first, others second, me last. Just like my runs, I can start off well. I get up and spend time with the Lord--I get filled up with Him with the hope that what I get filled with will flow out on those around me throughout the day. Just as physical 'training' is making me stronger to run a marathon, my daily time in God's Word and prayer is 'training' me spiritually to think and be more like Jesus. Starting the day off with God at the forefront is a great plan and gets that mentality of 'God first, others second, me last' in order. However, somewhere along the way--sometimes early on in the day--my mind shifts, these priorities change. 'Me' starts to creep up to the front. I hit the wall--the wall of 'Me'. I have found the wall of 'Me' to be the biggest challenge of my life. The wall of 'Me' disguises itself in all different ways, including what I have began to call 'emotional tizzies'. I can get worked up into an emotional tizzy in no time flat. And then my mind can become consumed with it. I've realized that I have to refuel my mind throughout the day with God's Word, not just in the morning. I've got to reframe and refocus my mind moment by moment. Just as running a marathon is a moment by moment battle, so is life. Focus, focus, focus. Where is my focus? What am I thinking on? Am I thinking about what I am thinking about? I don't want to be stuck behind the wall of 'me'. I want to climb it and conquer it and I know the only way to do that is through God's supernatural power.

'Test me, O Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for your love is ever before me, and I walk continually in your truth.' Psalm 26:2-3

'Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourself' Philippians 2:3

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things. Philippians 4:8

GO MOM!!!

WOW! My husband and sweet family pulled off a huge one last night! I still can't believe it. Supposedly, Eric was taking me out to dinner to celebrate my training/fundraising for Worldvision for the marathon (which is Sunday). Eric's sister and family came over to babysit and we left for my favorite restaurant (Chang's). So, we get to the restaurant, get out of the car and Eric says, 'Oh man, I forgot a gift card my manager gave me; we're going to have to go back and get it.' Now, knowing we have an expensive weekend coming up, gift cards are of upmost importance right now, so I didn't think it strange that we would drive back to our house to get it. So we get back in the car to drive to our house. I did think it strange, however, that he was driving mighty slow (he NEVER drives slow). As I was beginning to think he was acting strange, we rounded the corner to our house and pull up in front to a multitude of friends and family, yelling, 'SURPRISE!!!!'

I was in complete shock. The first thought to go through my head, 'Oh no! My hair is a mess!' :) At first, I was overwhelmed and I only saw a crowd...then, my eyes began to focus in on faces...first I saw several of my sweet neighbors, then other precious faces came into view--old friends and new friends...

I got out of the car...they had a huge banner painted in orange, saying 'Run, Maria, Run!'. Then, my niece Piper yelled, 'give me a G' The crowd: G!'

Piper: give me a 'O'

Crowd: 'O!'

Piper: give me a 'M'

Crowd: 'M!'

Piper: give me a 'O'

Crowd: 'O!'

Piper: give me a 'M'

Crowd: 'M!'

As they yelled each letter, each of my children ran out with the letter on a bright orange shirt.

Piper: What's that spell?

Crowd: GO, MOM!!!!

Oh my goodness! I was speechless. I was floored. I was overwhelmed by feelings of love. Now, I didn't cry because I never cry in the moment (HATE this about myself, by the way! Wished I cried in the moment). It always spills out later, at the strangest time. Probably, today, while I'm going through a drive through or at the library, it will hit me and spill out all over the place and people will think I'm weird.

Anyway, back to the party! They had a big spread of food, a huge cake with orange letters saying 'Run, Maria, Run!', orange napkins, orange everything! (Worldvision's color is orange, by the way). People brought cards.... wow, it was so encouraging!!!!!! I have never felt more loved. I was just, well, overwhelmed. I felt like I was being enveloped in one, gigantic hug last night. (okay, so now I am crying). I don't even know how to thank all of these incredible people. What a pep rally! You will never know how this has spurred me on! I just feel ....tingly. (Tingly? Is that all you can say?) I know, I know, I just don't know what to say! As my mom would have said, 'I'm just flabbergasted and beside myself!' :) Okay, there--I am flabbergasted and beside myself! Seriously, my husband and sweet mother/father in law and sister/brother in law are just over the top! Eric scored some major points tonight :) !!!! I just love you guys so much! Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. I feel so loved today. and READY TO RUN!!!!!!

Pics of the 'instigators':

'And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching' Hebrews 10:24-25

I LOVE YOU GUYS---I am adding this verse to my scripture cards for Sunday! I will be praying thanksgiving over you guys as I run!

Other pics:

Marathon Lesson #2

About half way through my training, I became so tired, bored and burnt out with my 'route.' I was running the same route over and over, with minor variations to adapt for the mileage my training schedule called for. Simply put, I was in a 'route rut'. While I was aware of my 'route rut', it took weeks of 'pounding the same pavement' before I finally took action. Maybe this is because I can be the queen of procrastination. Maybe it was fear--it can be intimidating to change things up, when things are going along okay. FINALLY, one night before a long run, Eric and I charted out a new course for me. Wow, what a difference it made in my running the next day! I felt like a new person! I felt like there was spring to my step that wasn't there before! I felt renewed and refreshed. My running went to a new level as I left that 'okay' and 'ho hum' stage.


So often, I get into a 'route rut' in my life. You know, the same old, same old. I stay in my comfort zone. I don't change things up--I stick with the 'comfortable'. I put God in a box, expecting Him to work in the same way over and over and over. I put my head down and do my tasks for the day and miss out on seeing God in a new way because I am so caught up in my 'route'--my agenda. I get 'comfortable' among my group of friends, hanging out with the same people over and over and miss out on God working among other relationships that God brings in my circle. If God is working in our lives, we should not be stagnant; we should not be 'ho hum'. We should be ever changing, moving to a new place and a new level of intimacy. I should embrace the changes God brings into my life and seek the adventure, excitement and new energy that accompanies that.

Marathon Training Lesson #1

Throughout my training, some days of running were great and some were awful. Some days I felt I could keep going forever, other days I just willed myself through it, counting down the minutes until my run was over. Now, if I had began 'focusing' on those down days too much, I would have gotten in a discouraged state of mind and this would have began affecting all of my runs. then, I would have felt defeated before I ever began running, because discouragement breeds discouragement. Instead, when I had a bad run, I had to let it go and remember the next day was a new day full of new hope. Marathon training is up and down; it's a process, full of successes and full of failures. Every run is definitely not going to be perfect. In fact, often the hard runs are where I learned the most about 'coping', and those lessons will probably be what gets me through the real race.



All of this made me reflect on my own life. I have and will have many successes and failures along the road of life. I am a flawed, imperfect human being who is going to make many mistakes. Even as I try to live my life for the Lord, so often I am going to get it so wrong, even if my heart was to get it right. But God does not want me to stay focused on and 'sit in' those failures. He wants me to learn from mistakes but than move forward, focusing on what lies ahead and live life to the best of my ability--for Him. And if I let them, those failures are going to help shape me into a person with more character and wisdom for the next curve in the road of life. I also can't live in the successes, or I am going to become puffed up and full of myself and start relying on myself and not Him. The point? I've got to keep on, keeping on, not focusing on the circumstances of the moment, but choosing to keep my gaze on Jesus every step of the way.

Lamentations 3:22-23: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning;great is your faithfulness.

Philippians 3:12-14: Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Up on Team World Vision!

Oh, this so resonates with me and gets me excited for October 12!!!! :) This gets at the very heart of why I am doing this marathon...well, it didn't start out that way, it started out as me just wanting to accomplish a goal, to be able to say, 'I ran a marathon.' But, it has turned into something so much more than this. Read this link below--she says it better than I could ever say it.
Oh, I am so very excited to be running on the same team as these people!!!!

http://schmunkthis.blogspot.com/2008/09/big-day.html

Just in Case Your Wondering...

As I was sitting in a bath tub full of ice freezing my buns off (ice baths are supposed to help with pain after long runs), I thought about the things marathon training is wreaking havoc on:

• my hair. Running with my hair stuffed up under a hat creates a mixture of dried up sweat + day old gel that ends of looking like a bird's nest gone haywire.
• my feet. Black toenails and blisters that looks like a bunyans growing out of the side of my foot is exactly what it sounds like-- U-G-L-Y
• my afternoon coffee break. Running when Eric gets home from work after coffee causes one upset stomach.

Just thought you'd want to know.

A Sweet Birthday Present

This morning I had to do my dreaded long run for the week--seventeen miles. I was dreading it, anticipating it and scared out of mind all at the same time. Today also happens to be my birthday. And my sweet husband and kids did something worth more than a hundred presents. They surprised me at mile 8 (literally--by jumping out from behind the bushes) with signs sporting my marathon bible verses and with yelling and hugging and cheering! And they had Grape G2 waiting for me--my favorite gatorade drink of all time! It was like an oasis in a desert. I thought when I walked out this morning that the humidity was low but was I ever wrong! I had just thought in my head, I wished I had some gatorade--I don't know if I can run the rest of this thing without it. So they were such a welcomed sight! Then, at mile 12--once again, there they sat in the white van with more gatorade and more cheering! Then at mile 16 (one mile to go) they had more gatorade more cheering and little runners who decided to run the last mile with me! What a sweet cheerleading crew and what a sweet birthday present. Love you guys---you are the best!!!!

First Donations!!!!

So I just checked my donations for team Worldvision and was so psyched to see that I have received two donations!!!! I am so excited!!! Thanks Nicole and Linda! You guys rock! And thanks for the encouraging comments! You guys made my day !!! :)