My mother passed away on Feb. 17, 2007 of this year. She was the picture of sacrifice. She never, ever did anything for herself. She sacrificed her personal time, her money, her whole life really, for us. She was one of the most giving persons I know. She raised five children all by herself and somehow kept her sanity--well, maybe partly kept her sanity :) . She always had time to talk on the phone, watch her grandkids, listen to our 'funny' stories. She had an off-the-wall sense of humor. She had a beautiful smile and fun laugh. She didn't have a materialistic bone in her body. Now, don't get me wrong. She wasn't perfect. There were times she made me mad. But one thing is for sure, she was ALWAYS there for us. And she loved us more than her own life. Over the past few months, I have learned so much from thinking back over her life. I have gotten a small human 'glimpse' of Jesus and his sacrifice for me in the sacrificial life my mom lived for my siblings and me. Jesus died for me so that I could live; my mom died to her own 'life' so that I could have the life I now have.
Mother's Day was really hard. I was on the verge of tears or in tears most of the day. The pain of her passing is still so very fresh. At first, right after she died, every day was hard. Then, it seemed like there were 'some' days out of the week that were hard. In recent weeks my 'hard days' have turned into 'hard moments'. Now I have 'moments' and I never ever know what is going to set off a 'moment'. Mother's Day was hard, yet because of Jeff and Reagan's wedding being the day before, it took the sting out of it just a little. It hit me today that God purposely planned for them to be married the day before Mother's Day. Because it is just another picture of how she wanted the focus on us and not on her. If their wedding hadn't been on Saturday, we would have all been sad and focused on our loss this weekend. Instead, we were able to all be together and celebrate the 'birth' of a marriage, a new addition to our family. The focus was on family, togetherness, memories, some tears, yet much laughter too. It was exactly the way she would have wanted it. Again, her sacrificial self lives on in this past weekend.
I guess the weekend was two-fold: God's gift of happiness in new 'beginnings' amidst our sorrow and the best Mother's Day present that my mom could ever have, even though she is not physically here to witness it: Her youngest son getting married!
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY, MOM, FROM YOUR 'PARTY OF FIVE'!
WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!